Some people would love Cohle for Christmas…

The first season of “True Detective” is all said and done, and the place where the Louisiana State Police Detectives Rust Cohle and Martin Hart once stood is now an empty void. But you better watch out, you better not cry, and you better not pout, because Santa Clause has case to solve. And he’s doing it “True Detective” style.

And just like Rust, you probably won’t understand anything he’s saying. You’ll say you do, but we all know you have no idea. Hopefully this parody made by the good folks at Heck Bender will yule tide you over until season two starts.