5 things Hello Kitty could be since she’s “not a cat”

With Hello Kitty Con coming to LA this fall, there’s some new details about the cat spreading through the internet. The biggest detail it would seem is that Sanrio, the company behind Hello Kitty, has stated that Hello Kitty is not a cat.

Let that soak in for a bit. This:

Is not a cat.

Not processing? Okay. This:

Is not a cat.

(Actually, that’s not even Hello Kitty! It’s her twin sister Mimmy. Another zany detail!)

So since she’s not a cat, what exactly is Hello Kitty?  Sanrio later stated, “We never said she was a human”, so she’s not cosplaying a cat.  So what could she be?! Well, lets brain storm some ideas since we’re all about categorizing fictional characters here on TPC.

 

She’s a toy that comes to life

The bio on Sanrio’s site lists Hello Kitty as weighing around “3 apples”.  The average apple weighs 5oz so Hello Kitty weighs about a pound.  This means she’s tiny.  Like, really tiny.  So it’s very much possible that she is some kind of cat-like porcelain doll cursed by a gypsy and doomed to walk the planet accepting hugs from everyone she comes across.

 

She is a cat but comes from a different caste system and is above the term “cat”

 The animated world is a very strange and peculiar one.  Not all animals are created equally.  Take Disney for example, where a dog can be both a pet and a home owner.  Perhaps Hello Kitty isn’t a “cat” but rather more of a “goofy” in her caste system.

 

She’s a bloody shapeshifter

I’m calling it right now.  Hello Kitty is a shapeshifter.  Granted the powers of shapeshifting from a dying alien, she has merely chosen the form of a cat to stand as a protector and loved one of the human race.

 

She’s a Robot

 She’s from Japan and the Japanese are known for their robots.  It’s very likely that Hello Kitty is a machine.  For one thing, it would explain her soulless eyes.

 

She’s an alien

Cats are from Earth.  Hello Kitty isn’t a cat.  Okay!  So maybe she only looks like a cat but isn’t a cat because she’s from space!  Lionel would approve of this theory.

 

 

Whatever Hello Kitty is, we know for sure that she loves Avril Lavigne.  And at the end of the day, isn’t that all that really matters?